How to Use a Bidet Bottle

Millions of people from all over the world use soda and milk bottles, small plastic watering cans, lotahs, shattaf, tabo, and other water vessels to clean themselves at the toilet. Besides daily personal bathroom hygiene, use of a handheld bidet substitute has other benefits: early detection of colorectal cancer, genital washing, gentle cleansing for hemorrhoid suffers and rectal surgery patients, less toilet paper consumption, reduced impact on the environment, better self-esteem, cleaner undergarments, and more pleasant intimate relationships. Bidet bottles provide cleaner and better alternatives to using toilet paper alone. If cleanliness is important to you but there is no bidet available, here’s how to use a bottle as a substitute.


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    Before you sit down on the toilet, fill one or two bidet bottles with lukewarm or warm water, then make a pad from 6-8 sheets of toilet paper and put it within reach of your left hand.
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    Do what you came in the bathroom for.
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    Follow the Unspoken Rule of Water Hygiene that millions worldwide adhere to: the left hand is used for bathroom cleaning, the right hand is for eating and greeting. This is very important to remember, especially if you travel worldwide.
    • If you are female and only went pee, simply pick up the bottle with your right hand and gently pour the warm water over your genital area. While still sitting, use your left hand to agitate the water to clean yourself. Take the pad of toilet paper with left hand and dab yourself dry. You are now done.
    • If you are male and had a bowel movement, you will need to pour the water from behind. Scoot slightly forward to provide space behind you. Wet the fingers of your left hand (so nothing sticks), then pour the water out of the bottle in your right hand, letting the water run down your bum. Use your left hand to agitate your rectum area and remove the feces that is on you and your bum hair, if you are a hairy male. Using your left hand, dab yourself dry with the pad of paper. Don't rub, as the paper will ball up and cling to hairs. You are now done.
    • If you are female and had a bowel movement, you can let the water from the bidet bottle cascade down from the front. Again, make sure that the fingers of your left hand are wet before you start cleaning. This way you wash both your vaginal area (remove pee) and remove feces by using your left hand to agitate. (You can do this from the front as you have no "junk" to get in the way.) Also, the water flow direction is to the rear, preventing any feces from coming in contact with vaginal area. Use your left hand to dab yourself dry with the wad of toilet paper you prepared. And you are done.
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    Check the pad of toilet paper after you dry yourself. This is the time to make sure you did a good job, but more importantly, to look for any kind of discharge that may indicate a call to a doctor: blood, spotting of blood, unusual discharge or discoloration, anything out of the ordinary.
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    When you have finished and stood up, wash your hands thoroughly. Use soap and water and scrub up for at least two renditions of "Yankee Doodle" or "Happy Birthday."


  • If your mate's clothing shows signs of inadequate bathroom cleansing (i.e., "racing stripes"), get him to use a bidet bottle to get really clean. We joke about cling-ons and dingle-berries, but this only means a person is not clean. Once you get accustomed to being clean, you will want the same level of cleanliness from and for your loved ones.
  • Check your pad of toilet paper after patting yourself dry for signs of anything that may require a doctor's attention. Don't let blood spotting or discolored mucus go without a call to your MD. If you use only toilet paper to clean, finding signs of trouble will be difficult.
  • Regardless of your sexual preference, be as clean as you can be for your partner. Washing before going to bed allows you to be sure should intimacy take place. You can also wash your partner, so you both know you are clean.
  • More than twenty million trees are cut each year to make toilet paper for the US alone. Using bidet bottles will help reduce this consumption.
  • Using a bidet bottle is ideal for hemorrhoid sufferers. There is no gentler method to get truly clean like you can by using water. The same holds true for rectal surgery patients and new mothers who have temporary hemorrhoids.
  • Remember this is an ancient practice that has always just used water, nothing else.
  • If your baby can sit up and has a diaper rash from prolonged exposure to poop or pee, wash your child at every diaper change on the toilet using a bidet bottle for faster healing. Kids love the warm soothing water, and you will have a clean happy baby.
  • Try a liter soda bottle to experiment.


  • Do not add soap or other additives into the bidet bottles. Keep it clean and pure by just using plain water. You don't know how you may react to an additive; as women know, getting soap in certain areas can cause problems.
  • Remember: left hand for cleaning, right hand for greeting. This rule is very important and followed globally. Do not gross out people of other cultures by eating or greeting with your "bathroom" (left) hand.
  • Most bottles are blow molded and thin, so they may not be firm enough to maneuver when full without spilling a little. If you've been using a makeshift bottle but want to improve your water hygiene, or ask a pharmacist or store manager for help.

Things You'll Need

  • A liter soda bottle or other container that you can handle with ease, and that can hold at least a liter of warm water
  • Toilet paper

Sources and Citations

Article Info

Categories: Health Hygiene