How to Make Friends with a Guy You Just Met

Have you ever seen a guy in a bookstore, school, movie theater or even on the street, and you wonder what he's like and what it would be like to get to know him? Do you like his style? Do you 100 percent feel that this person is going to fit in with you? Why not go with it? Don't ever get shy around a guy.


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    Segue into a conversation. Don't just go up to the guy and ask what his name is; mention something about him that you find interesting, and get into a conversation that way. Some examples are: "I've read that, it's really good." "Sorry, that vending machine's broken. Don't you hate it when that happens?", "Wow, it's like these cashiers are moving underwater.", "Nice shirt. I love their music.", "Do you know what time it is?".
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    Smile and laugh. Nothing puts people more at ease than if they think someone else is having fun. It will open him up more and make him more interested in talking to you.
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    Ask at least 5 questions about him when you talk; you shouldn't hog the whole conversation. Just make sure they're in context and not out of the blue. Also don't tell many stories as it will probably bore him.
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    Ask him for his email address or screen name when you think things are going well. Those are more casual than talking on the phone, and don't have all the cultural strings attached to "talking on the phone with a guy". It will make you seem less forward.
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    Don't send him an email/IM him right when you get home; wait a day or two. When you do first email/IM him, restate who you are, like "remember me from...?"
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    Think of the possibilities between you and your new friend:
    • If you want to be friends with him, that's really as far as you have to go. A string of emails or the occasional IM means you did it! You've succeeded in becoming friends with a guy you just met. Congratulations on it!
    • If you want to be closer friends with him, invite him out to the movies with a couple of your close friends (be sure to invite guys too to make him more comfortable). If your friends get to know him, you'll probably be seeing him more often.
    • If you find out you like him more than a friend, also invite him to the movies with your friends. If you both like it, make it a regular thing. Start flirting with him a little; he'll get the idea. Sit next to him too, if that's possible. If he seems to want to go farther with you, invite him to the movies, just the two of you, and see what happens. Do other activities too, like going to the park, an art museum, a walk, out for a drink, etc.


  • Don't be afraid. You only have one life, and if he doesn't like you, you'll probably never see him again. Besides, would you rather stand there and watch him when you can possibly be striking a nice conversation with an amazing sweetheart?
  • Talk, smile, say anything. To fail is better than to do nothing.
  • Try to set a good, jolly mood while with him. A guy most likely would rather not want to talk to you in a "whatever" mood if you just met him or you don't know each other that well. [This also applies to the tip above to work successfully without getting a weird, embarrassing look from him.]
  • Get his phone number. Doing this will make it easier to contact him in the future!
  • Touch him physically, surprise him, but don't freak him out.
  • Just ask him to be friends with you. Say to him something like, "Hey! Let's be friends!" or, "Hey! You're my new best friend!" In a jokingly manner, or something relative to that subject. It sounds somewhat silly, but in many, many cases, it certainly works!
  • When you're texting someone you like, don't text back right away. He might think you're desperate, so wait at least 30 seconds to one minute before replying.
  • Don't rush it! Remember that this friendship isn't going to kick-start in a day or a week. It may take several months, or maybe even a year, for him to consider you a best or somewhat close friend.


  • If you get uncomfortable with the conversation or feel that something's wrong, trust your instincts and get out of there immediately. Say you're late for something or pretend to get a phone call. Or just say you have to get going. Striking up conversations with people you've never seen before can be really fun and interesting, but it can also sometimes be dangerous.
  • If you see that he's not really into the conversation, it's probably because he's not interested in you. Take the hint; just say something like "OK, so I'll see you around then," and go away. There's no point in staying there if he doesn't really want to be there. Remember that some guys aren't very social either, and that he could be shy too. Look out for those signals!
  • Not everybody will want to be your friend or get further into a relationship. Such is life.

Things You'll Need

  • A guy you think would be cool to get to know.
  • A bright personality! People feed off of energy.

Article Info

Categories: Forming Friendships