How to Live Without Friends During School Years

Having no friends doesn't have to be bad - it can be good too, depending on your personality. Living without friends has to be approached differently during school years, whether you are in elementary, middle school, high school, or college.


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    Be active. If you don't want to join a team, that's okay too - you can still do sports. Go swimming, running, walking by yourself, or go ice skating. Try trampolining, archery, golf and other solo sports. Play soccer in your backyard, and get your brother or another family member to play with you, or just play by yourself. Take a ride on your bike, put on some music and dance around. Go to a gym and work out in the weight room or go to the a fitness center at your school or community. There are lots of active things you can do without having to socialize with others.
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    Be creative. It can take up a lot of the time you would've otherwise spent with others. Draw, read, write, paint, sew, sculpt etc. Fiddle around with PhotoShop, or learn how to play an instrument. Photography is a great suggestion, too - you could even buy a video-camera. Write some songs and try recording them, or producing them.
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    Use your imagination and dream. You could imagine going to Hogwarts with Harry Potter, or you could imagine you were a super star. You could imagine being in Terabithia. You could imagine Johnny Depp or Brad Pitt taking you out - anything, really. Only your imagination sets the limits.
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    Join an online community. You don't have to make friends if you don't want to, but sometimes just talking to other people can help overcome loneliness. You can talk in online communities or play online games to make friends.
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    Enjoy your own company at school. Look around the school grounds, find a nice, quiet place, it could be anywhere - behind a few bushes, near a tree; anywhere. Bring books or pen and paper with you, and go there during recess. It'll be your own, private little place where you can read, catch up on your homework, draw, write... Anything you want to, really.
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    Sit by yourself in the cafeteria at lunch. If your school allows it (or you know you won't get caught), listen to music on your iPod, MP3 or CD player. If you're allowed to, you could even take your food somewhere else where you can sit by yourself.
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    If you're doing group work at school, ask your teacher if it would be possible for you to do it by yourself. They'll most likely say yes, but if not, ask someone else if you can be in their group. If everyone says no, your teacher will have you put in some group anyway or let you do the project yourself.
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    If your parents will allow you, get a pet. They can often be better friends than actual human beings.
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    If you're neither sporty nor creative, and if you think reading is boring, get another hobby. Collect something! That way you'll still have something to spend your time with. It could be anything, autographs from your favourite celebrities, coins, stamps, postcards... The options are endless. Video games and TV are a waste of time if you are not that type of person.
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    Avoid parties and other kinds of social events if possible. It usually won't be a lot of fun if you have no friends. If you have to go though, take a book or your camera, so you have something to do. Otherwise, just take a walk outside until it's okay for you to leave.
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    Sign up for volunteer work. Browse around the net, there's probably some kind of charity you can help out with. It'll give you a nice feeling of doing something good, and it's going to look great on your resume when you're applying for college or when you're looking for a job.
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    Find out which TV show is your favorite, and watch it as often as you can. Sometimes following the lives of your favourite TV characters can be a substitute to having friends.
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    If there's something that means a lot to you, such as world peace or stopping animal cruelty, take time out to fight for it. Find out where there are demonstrations, and join them. Write letters to politicians or newspapers, and make banners. You might even want to organize a demonstration of your own.
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    Go out! Just because you don't have any friends, it doesn't mean you can't go out and have a great time. Go to the movies, shop, go to an amusement park or the circus, visit museums - you might even want to just take a stroll in the park by yourself an enjoy the weather. You could take the bus or train to a random city, and take a walk through it. Take your camera so you can photograph anything you see that interests you. This is a great way to just get away. Renting a bunch of movies, making popcorn and then having your own, private little party can be cool too.
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    Get a job. Ask around to find out where there's an open position, it could be at the town library, some clothing store, the local Starbucks, McDonald's - anywhere! Getting a job is an excellent way to experience people and contribute to society. Plus, you'll end up with a fat paycheck to boost your savings.
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    Play video games! Video games are a great way to spend time by yourself, you can buy a console such as an Xbox or Ps3, or play a game on the computer. Not all games are single player though, some MMORPGS such as World of Warcraft, Warhammer, or Runescape if you don't want to pay can be loads of fun.


  • Don't listen to any negativity from anyone. If someone talks down to you, don't feel inferior. Stand up for yourself. Lots of people see people with no friends as easy targets - knock that thought right out of their head. Don't use any actual violence though, telling them off should be enough. If they're just joking in a loving manner though, just laugh along. But tell the difference. You don't want to be known as an aggressive jerk, but you don't want the be the weak kid everyone can mock either.
  • Don't let anyone tell you how you should be or what you should do - not even your parents. You are who you are; be proud of that person. Don't be too proud to admit it if you're wrong though.
  • Even if you're not friends with the other kids, be nice to them. Get good grades and be polite to everyone - that way they won't have anything to use against you.
  • If you are still sad that you have no friends, remind yourself that you are not the only one going through this.
  • Remember, even if you don't have any friends, you're still an awesome person. Don't let anyone take you down. If you feel upset or lonely, listen to music that will cheer you up. 'Keep The Faith', 'Man In The Mirror', 'Unbreakable' and 'You Are Not Alone' by Michael Jackson,'High school' by Superchick, 'Through The Rain' by Mariah Carey, 'When You Wish Upon A Star' by Louis Armstrong, 'Something Beautiful' by Robbie Williams,' Keep holding on' by Avril Lavigne and 'Beautiful', by Christina Aguilera. 'I Will Survive' by Gloria Gaynor might be a good choice, too. Find your own favorite, and listen to it whenever you're down.
  • If people call you weird, odd or strange, take it as a compliment. It may not always sound nice, but nonetheless it means you're different and unique. Smile and say thank you; don't get offended. That's probably the reaction they're hoping for.
  • Remember: there are advantages to being a loner! No one judges you, and all your thoughts are to yourself.
  • If you don't have any friends, you don't need their opinion. If you do have friends but you feel leftover because they hate you or anything like that, then talk to them and express your feelings. Don't hold your feeling. And as Kid President said, everyone needs a pep talk.
  • Some things may make it harder to make friends, such as having bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, ADHD, or autism, just to name a few. Maybe it might be time to see a counselor, doctor, or psychologists if you feel there is something wrong.
  • If your friends are mean to you, just don't be their friends anymore because it's better to lonely than with negative people. Trust me they're not worth your friendship .
  • Don't chase friends. If they aren't returning the same enthusiasm about being your friend, it's not worth it. You'll end up designing your entire life and schedule around them.

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Categories: Friendship Problems