How to Help Your Children With Hurts

Here's a little one-two step that will get you inside your children's mind and help you to help them when hurts come. It's also a way for you to share the happier moments of their life. This little method will open the lines of communication for you and your child and draw you closer to one another.


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    Ask your child playfully, "What was the worse thing that happened to you today?" They will consider and then share with you an uncomfortable moment. If it is minor you can shrug and grin and say something like, "don't you hate it when that happens?" You might tell them about an embarrassing moment you had or remind them of a similar incident a sibling had happen to show them they are not alone in their misery; everyone feels stupid sometimes! If it is something more hurtful, you have the opportunity to counsel with them later. Sometimes you can help them to understand why it happened or just help them put it in perspective.
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    Ask them now, "What was the best thing that happened to you today?" This ends on a happier note and you can rejoice with them over the happy moments in their lives.


  • Keep it light. This is a game for them and not ever to be grilling! You needn't do it every day, just often enough to keep caught up with what's going on in their lives.
  • Dinner is the ideal time for this conversation when the whole family is together (turn the TV off!). It becomes a happily anticipated game the children look forward to. It goes around the table, each with his or her moment in the limelight—and everyone loves attention!
  • Sometimes the other children will put in their two cents worth, relating their own similar woes or triumphs.They can also give ways they handled things, like being snubbed at school. They know the ins and outs of the way things work at school when you do not and may really be helpful in that department. It will draw your children closer to one another as they hear each others pain or triumphs.
  • By demonstrating your interest in them and your love and support for them they will grow into confident people, believing themselves to be worthy of being heard; not constantly being pushed aside and ignored by parents with busy lives, as sometimes unintentionally happens.
  • You will have established an open line of communication between them and yourself so that when the unthinkable happens, such as a surprise pregnancy, they can and will be more apt to come to you for help.


  • Though arranging for dinner together is admittedly tough, with Mom working and ball practice, it will be well worth it in the long run. According to the National Center on Addiction and Substance Abuse (CASA), children who do not have meals with their family are much more likely to use drugs and alcohol, so you have a great bonus benefit!. If you can't manage dinner, try to find another time; bedtime or whenever... driving to school, perhaps. Just so you do it!

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Categories: Childhood Health