How to Get Social With Kids of Your Age

Three Parts:ConfidenceSelf-careInteracting with others

Getting social with your pals is very important. Being too shy is not going to do any good, instead, it is just going to make you feel lonely and left out.

Part 1

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    Be confident. Confidence is about knowing that you matter and are as valuable as the next person. Confidence is about knowing that you are worth knowing. Moreover, confidence is about feeling beautiful and valued without having to have someone else tell you this.
    • More than anything, confidence attracts. People love being near someone who has obvious self-confidence.
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    Smile a lot. Smiling attracts people because it's a sign of friendliness and approachability.
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    Rehearse the things you like talking about. If you feel tongue-tied talking to others, realize that this isn't unusual. Practice talking about a set of things that interest you. Stand in front of the mirror and practice talking about a few topics that you know a lot about; watch your facial expression, how your hands move and listen to the things you say. Are there changes you could make to improve how you say things and what you're saying? By practicing, you build up the confidence to talk more about these and other topics with other people.
    • Things you could talk about include: Hobbies, sports, studies, your pets, travel (or places you'd like to go), future plans, passions, etc.

Part 2

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    Care for your body. Clean your teeth daily, maintain good hygiene and look after your hair. Wear sunscreen to protect your skin and have a good skin care regime. There is no need to be obsessed with your looks; just care for yourself properly so that you present well and keep healthy. Good grooming is a sign of being willing to spend time presenting yourself well to others.
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    Dress smartly. Whatever your preferred style, wear it well. It doesn't matter what your age, size or height are; what matters is that the clothes you wear are neat, clean and worn well. Choose clothes that suit you best and are comfortable for you. Fix any missing buttons, tears, loose threads, etc. so that your clothing looks well cared for.
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    Have good grades. Good grades give you confidence, are a sign of self-care and also give you something to talk about with others. Being known as someone who does well at school also opens up the opportunities for tutoring others in need.
    • If you get good grades, don't talk about them too much. Your friends of classmates that doesn't have as good grades as you might get jealous.

Part 3
Interacting with others

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    Be friendly with people. By being open to all, you open the possibility of future friendships. Most importantly, don't wait for others to be friendly to you––lead the way by showing them how!
    • Try not to make assumptions about the people you're meeting for the first time; you don't know them yet, and there are many things to learn about them.
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    Be prepared to talk to everyone. You've rehearsed your topics, so you know you have things to talk about. Try to find common connections with people, no matter how much of a challenge the other person may seem at first. Realize that often the most difficult people are wanting most to be understood; maybe this is something you can do.
    • Don't ignore people on purpose; it's unkind and it cuts off the chance that that person may just be the most interesting person in the room.
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    Listen. Although you may enjoy talking, remember to listen more than you talk. Being an earnest listener draws people out and they feel a deeper connection with you; this encourages them to see you positively and to know that you're not only thinking about yourself.
    • Learn the paraphrase what people say, namely, summarize what they've said and say it back to them by way of showing you've heard. This is not the same as agreeing; you do not need to see eye-to-eye with someone to have a good conversation and to learn about each other.
    • Catch yourself if you want to interrupt. Be genuinely interested in what you're hearing instead, focusing on getting to know this person better.
    • Be patient; most times you will get your turn to speak too. If not, then you know that this person is probably not good friend material, at least not with you.
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    Enjoy yourself at parties and other social events. See such events as a chance to meet new people, to talk to people you know and to have a good time. You don't have to stay a long time if you feel overwhelmed; do quality time instead.


  • Be nice to people; you get back what you put in.
  • Dress smartly and stylishly.


  • Dress stylishly, not wildly.

  • Don't spend all the time partying.

Article Info

Categories: Social Interactions for Youth