How to Express Emotional Pain in a Healthy Way

Social and emotional intelligence is a key factor to enhancing the quality of our lives. Below are some great tips to becoming more Emotionally Fit and "self-aware."


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    Have an alarm. For the next week, carry a watch or travel alarm with you, or set your cell phone or computer clock alarm to ring at several intervals throughout the day.
    • At the times listed on the schedule, fill in the blanks with what you are doing, and who you are doing it with, the emotion(s) you are feeling in the moment, and what your body is sensing at the moment, or what effect the emotion is having on your body.
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    Know the purpose of your alarm. Remember, you are seeking to understand your feelings. You are not trying to change them. They are not right or wrong. Therefore, honesty is important. However, recognition alone can often diffuse or increase an emotional reaction.
    • You may find that over time, the intensity of some moods decrease, while other sensations, hopefully the more pleasant ones, increase. That's why emotional intelligence helps in all aspects of your personal growth.
  3. 3
    Regularly check in on your feelings. During the course of the day, schedule brief but frequent check-ins on your emotional state, as well as what your body might be feeling or trying to tell you.


  • If you find yourself clenching your teeth, tensing your shoulders, feeling worn out or worn down, stop and ask yourself what your body is trying to tell you – are you feeling strained? Stressed? Anxious? Fearful? Overwhelmed? Discouraged? Burned out? Name your emotions and connect them specifically to a source or to a situation, concern, or issue
  • Listen to what your emotions might be telling you in that moment. Use the information that bubbles up from inside, listen to your intuition to gain insight that could guide you in dealing with the issue or challenge
  • Take time to be introspective, to listen to that quiet inner voice. Put aside some of your goal-oriented activities and think. Take long walks, know your core values, and especially stop thinking of your emotions as irrelevant or messy. Our emotions are an essential source of valuable information.

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Categories: Merge | Managing Negative Feelings