How to Date a Mormon

Are you dating or interested in dating someone who is a Mormon? The following steps are a good start on knowing what to expect out of your relationship.

Steps

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    Understand that Mormons have guidelines or standards they follow when it comes to dating.
    • They are advised not to date until the age of 16.
    • They are advised to begin dating in groups while in high school.
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    Be open-minded. Mormons do things that others may find odd:
    • Pray before meals.
    • Go to church for three hours on Sunday and attend for high school age Mormons, they attend a weekly activity night.
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    Talk to them. Your Mormon significant other will likely be willing to talk to you about their beliefs. You should also share your beliefs and can help find common beliefs. It will help you understand them if you learn a little about them. They may invite you to Church activities. Decide for yourself if you want to participate. Many activities, like dances and youth activities, are more social than religious, and are a great opportunity to meet new people.
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    Respect other people’s beliefs. If you respect other people’s beliefs, they are more likely to respect yours and more likely to like you.
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    Keep in mind that Mormons don't drink coffee, tea, alcohol, or beer, and don't smoke tobacco or any substance. They may be uncomfortable in situations where people are partaking in these substances, and especially if you are one of those people. (This applies more to alcohol and tobacco, but depending on the person may apply to coffee and teas as well.)
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    Meet the parents. When meeting the parents make sure you dress nice. Don’t wear offensive t-shirts or revealing clothes. Be respectful and don’t swear.
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    Understand the Law of Chastity. Mormons as well as many other Christian faiths believe in the Law of Chastity. It basically means that they shouldn’t have sex before marriage. Understand that your Mormon significant other will not want to have physical relations with you before marriage. Have respect for their belief and don't pressure them. More specifically it says that, until after marriage, they also shouldn’t:
    • Participate in passionate kissing.
    • Lie on top of the other person.
    • Touch private parts of another person’s body with or without clothing.
    • View pornography, before or after marriage. Viewing pornography is not acceptable, ever.
    • Arouse sexual emotions in any way except having relations with their spouse. Not even watching movies with nudity.
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    Understand the Word of Wisdom. Mormons also have a set of health guidelines called the "Word of Wisdom". It advises that people eat healthy and balanced diets, and in particular prohibits them from consuming alcohol, tobacco, coffee, and tea.
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    Realize that some Mormons will only marry in the Temple. In order to get married in the Temple you and your spouse both need to be Mormon. So if you're dating a Mormon, and they wish to be married in the Temple consider converting to Mormonism if both of you wish to be married.

Tips

  • Mormons are taught to be attracted to what is inside of a girl, not the outside.

Warnings

  • Some Mormons will go against their beliefs but if you push them to continue they will spiral into a deep depression caused by it so try to be a good example to them.
  • Respect their standards - Mormons tend to have personal standards that you may find hard to live with, but hey who doesn't? Respect them and don't ask them to change. (Side note: It's a good idea to respect everyone's beliefs and morals, no matter what your relationship with them is.)
  • Let them be individuals - Not all Mormons keep strictly to each standard presented here. By asking questions and being open to their answers, you will understand how closely their standards match their church's.

Sources and Citations

  • For the Strength of Youth, the booklet given to all youth in the Church that goes over all of the moral standards and requirements of the Church and its gospel. Though it's primarily a youth resource, it applies to ALL Church members, not just the ones below 18.

Article Info

Categories: Going Steady | Mormonism