How to Convince Parents to Find Time for Themselves

Many articles tell you how to let parents know that you need time for yourself or convince parents that you need your space. Very few people realize that after certain age, your parents become your responsibility and these concerns get flipped around. This article is not about how to care for your parents, but about how to make them realize that they have a life of their own. It'll help you to help them realize that they have done enough for you and now it’s time for them to start living for themselves. So, how to bring them back to life and encourage them to make time for themselves?


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    Start the conversation. The very first and basic step is you need to initiate talking about the matter. Keep it light. You have to bring that comfort level so that they feel like they can open up to you. This comes through sharing and asking them about what is happening in their life. Slowly you need to encourage them to include some activity. By regularly asking them about how and what they're doing, you can encourage them to find activities that keep themselves busy, which will keep them active as well as mentally or physically fit and more over they’ll start enjoying their life and leisure time.
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    Help them find out their interests. You might already have a head start here. Your mum might have told you how she likes to try new recipes or she wishes she knew how to take better photographs, or your dad may enjoy hanging out with his friends or playing chess. Help them find what they want to do. Ask them about where their interests lie and if necessary, make suggestions. Encourage your mom to join a book group or a cooking class. Ask if your dad wants to join a club or start writing articles or a novel. By encouraging them in whatever endeavors interest them, you can help release them from the idea that their whole life revolves around you.
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    Make them realize you have grown up. Parents are sometimes scared of finding time for themselves or doing anything for themselves because they think it might distract them from being parents. You need to assure them that now you are grown enough to look after yourself, it’s time for them to focus on themselves. You need to convince them that you are grown up! This won’t happen by simply saying to them, “Ma/Papa, I am grown up now. I can look after myself.” No! Truly convincing them requires you to handle your responsibilities and demonstrate your independence through your actions.
    • Not only can you show responsibility for yourself, but you can also show them that you're ready and eager to help them out, too. Taking your parents to their appointments, helping them around the house, or doing other favors and errands for them can help. Taking care of their needs and most importantly finding time for them is key, too; call them regularly to ask how their day was or what are they planning to do this weekend will make a big difference. Bottom line is you have to make them realize you can take care of yourself, so now they should spend their time on themselves.
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    Spend time with them doing things they like. If they like doing something, get involved in it with them. If your dad likes playing pool, go and play with him. If your mum likes playing games on her phone, sit along with her and watch her play. If she likes cooking, ask her to teach you a new recipe, or suggest a new recipe to her. By showing your enthusiasm for what they're doing, you can subtly push them to stay engaged with those activities. And the fact that you are taking interest in what they are doing will keep them motivated; everyone likes to feel appreciated and supported for the things they want to do.
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    Be consistently supportive. No plan will succeed unless it’s been put to practice consistently. On a regular basis, talk about their interests and activities and motivate them to keep on finding time for themselves. Regularly suggest new ideas they can try if they lose interest in the hobbies they've been pursuing so far.


  • If you are in your twenties or above, it’s your time to help them give meaning to their life.

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Categories: Family Life