How to Calm Oneself

Have you ever felt a need to chill out? Or found yourself in the process of becoming more excited and wanting to short circuit the process? Read on to learn how to avoid feeding in to your feelings.


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    Breathe. Just breathe. Slowly. Breathe in for 5 seconds; hold for 5 seconds and then out for 5 seconds. This works because you are doing the opposite of what an excited person would be doing.
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    Sit down. Feet flat on the floor, arms by your side, hands in your lap. This also works because you are then doing the opposite of what an excited person would be doing.
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    Imagine you are somewhere calm, doing something relaxing and, well... calming! It may help to invent this scene before you are... not calm, or you will have a mental blank. This works because you are not visualizing your fears and feeding your excitement.
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    Stop worrying! Worrying won't get you anywhere or help you achieve anything so why waste your energy. Easier said than done, yes but if you can feel yourself beginning to worry just think about something else. Worries are familiar paths to travel in our brain, and easy for us to follow. If you have a concern, and you can do something about it right now, do it. If not, it will keep.
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    Realize why you are not calm. If you know are worked up, then you can ignore or get over what agitates you.
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    Have fun! Chances are, if you're not calm and you don't want to keep it that way (eg: you wouldn't want to be calm if you were ecstatic), you're stressed, angry or depressed. If you're having fun and generally enjoying life, scenarios which cause these feelings will appear less often. So laugh at life and have fun. You only live this life once.


  • Avoiding the habits of mind that lead us to anxiety, unnecessary worry for example, will allow calm appraisal rather than a need to flee.
  • These techniques work because our nervous systems work in only one direction at a time. We can flee or fight in one direction, and rest and digest in the other direction. If we assume a rest and digest posture and breathing pattern, our minds follow our behaviors. If we assume the posture and breathing pattern, and occupy our minds with calming thoughts, so much the better.


  • Do not think you are a failure if you are not calm all the time, even if you implement these steps of any other guidance you have been given. No one is calm all the time; that is unnatural.

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Categories: Emotional Health