How to Be Romantic

Five Methods:Be ThoughtfulBe CreativeKeep Things FreshKeep Growing TogetherRomance Help

It takes great care, forethought, and creativity to be truly romantic. If you want to be romantic, then you have to find an unexpected and exciting way to express your love to another person. It can be tricky to be romantic without feeling corny or insincere, whether you're starting a new relationship and want to show your new significant other how much you care, or if you've been with the same partner for twenty years and want to keep things fresh. If you want to know how to be romantic, just follow these steps.

Method 1
Be Thoughtful

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    Give thoughtful gifts. Though flowers or chocolate can make almost anyone smile, you can surprise your loved one even more if you give a gift tailored to his or her personality, so it's something that he or she will really appreciate. This type of gift will be very romantic because it will show that you put a lot of thought into what would make the perfect gift for your special someone. Here are some romantic gift ideas:
    • Gifts for a music lover: concert tickets, an iTunes gift card, a new CD, a book about his or her favorite artist or band, a record player with a few records, a DVD of a concert of his/her favorite band, a poster of his/her favorite band, or even a bobble-head of his or her favorite musician.
    • Gifts for a sports fan: a signed baseball, basketball, or football, a baseball cap or jersey with his or her favorite team's logo on it, tickets to a highly sought-after game, a "voucher" for a weekend trip to see a new sports arena, a shout-out on the Jumbotron during a game, or a documentary about your loved one's favorite athlete.
    • Gifts for a food lover: a new cookbook, a subscription to a cooking magazine, a gift card to a new restaurant, a fancy bottle of wine paired with delicious cheese, enrollment in a cooking class, a fancy new cooking tool, or nice new serving bowls.
    • Gifts for a fashion lover: a gift card to his or her favorite store, a new outfit from his/her favorite store, a new pair of shoes, tickets to a fashion show, or fashionable accessories.
    • Gifts for a book lover: an e-reader, a personalized bookmark, a signed copy or first edition of a book, a gift card to a book store, a surprise trip to a reading by his or her favorite author, or a copy of a rare book.
    • Gifts for an outdoor lover: Clothing for his or her favorite activity, whether it's hiking or mountain biking, sunglasses or binoculars, guidebooks for a new location he or she wanted to visit, or other outdoor gear they've wanted, like a new backpack.
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    Take your love on thoughtful dates. Though any date that is planned with love and care is very romantic, it would be even more romantic if you planned a date tailored to the needs and interests of your loved one. If your love interest hates the outdoors but you plan a long hiking adventure, then that wouldn't be very romantic. If you want to plan a romantic date that's perfect for your loved one, then try some of these tips:
    • Dates for a music lover:
      • Go to his or her favorite artist's concert. If it's a free concert at a park, pack a small picnic to accompany the show.
      • Listen to a local jazz or folk concert at a small cafe. Enjoy wine or dessert while you listen.
      • Cook a romantic meal while listening to the records of your loved one's favorite artist.
      • If you play the guitar, write a romantic song and serenade your loved one with it.
      • Spend an afternoon perusing a record store with your loved one. Then go home and enjoy your new acquisitions.
    • Dates for an outdoor lover:
      • Go on a hike to the top of the mountain and enjoy a picnic along the way.
      • Take a boat ride.
      • Ride bikes on a wooden trail.
      • Go horseback riding.
      • Take a long walk or a jog on the beach together.
      • Spend a night stargazing on a blanket. Bring a small telescope for the occasion.
    • Date for the sentimental type:
      • If you've been together for a while, recreate your first date together and write your loved one a letter that shows how much your love has grown since then.
      • Spend a day hitting up all of your favorite local haunts. Order the same foods and drinks you used to love.
      • Spend a night in looking at your old photos and letters.
    • Dates for a food lover:
      • Cook your loved one her favorite meal. Practice making it when he or she isn't there so it's perfect.
      • Make cheese or chocolate fondue together.
      • Arrange a perfect cheese and nuts plate to go with a nice bottle of wine.
      • Play light jazz, light candles, and cook a meal together.
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    Leave thoughtful notes for your loved one. If you want to keep your romance alive, then you should leave thoughtful notes for your loved one to find when you aren't around. If you leave the house earlier than your loved one for work or another reason, leave a post-it note on the bathroom mirror that tells your loved one something like, "I hope you have a wonderful day, sweetie. I can't wait to see you tonight!" This will make your loved one smile as soon as he/she sees it. Here are some other ways to leave thoughtful notes:
    • Leave a note in your loved one's textbook or pleasure-reading book. Your loved one may not find it for a few days, but when he/she does, it'll put a big smile on his/her face.
    • If your loved one is going away on a trip for a few days, put it in his or her travel bag, in a place where he/she won't look until he/she gets to his/her destination. This will make him/her think of you as soon as he/she opens it, and you won't feel like you're so far away.
    • If you're feeling really romantic, you can even write a love letter.
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    Send thoughtful texts or emails throughout your day. Though you shouldn't smother your loved one with love all day long or its effect will begin to wear off, you can just remind him or her of how much you love him/her by sending a short email during your work day, or sending a sweet text or two just to say that you're thinking of him/her. Here are some ways to send thoughtful texts or emails throughout your day:
    • Send a quick email that says something like this: "Dear Joan, I've been thinking about that amazing meal you made for me last night. I'm so lucky to have you in my life. I can't wait to take you out to dinner this weekend to return the favor. Yours, Mark."
    • Send a quick text that says something like: "What is my love up to this afternoon? I hope you're enjoying the sunshine."
    • Don't go overboard -- just one message each day will get the point across.
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    Do thoughtful favors. If you want to be romantic, then you have to be able to read your loved one's mind and to know when he or she needs to you to help out a bit by doing a small favor. Though you may not think running to the grocery store to pick up a few day's worth of groceries when your loved one is busy is very romantic, it actually shows that you're thoughtful and attentive to your loved one's needs. Here are some thoughtful favors you can do to show you care:
    • If your loved one has a cold, take on pet duty for the week. Offer to walk his/her dog in the mornings, or to help feed and take care of his/her pet.
    • If your loved one's allergies are raging, offer to water the plants for a few weeks until he/she feels better.
    • If your loved one is tied up at work, step out to get him/her some lunch and hot coffee.
    • If your loved one mentioned some errand he/she needed to run, surprise him/her by doing it for him/her.

Method 2
Be Creative

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    Write "I love you" in unlikely places. Write "I love you" in the steam of the bathroom mirror after your loved one takes a shower. This will be a fun and fresh romantic surprise. You can also carve this into a tree trunk on your property, or into an old wooden table that you own. You can even tell the waiter to write "I love you" in chocolate on top of a dessert in a restaurant.[1]
    • Write "I love you" in the sand on a beach.
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    Make a mixed CD for your special someone. Fill it with songs that are meaningful to the relationship or that remind you of the other person. You can leave the CD in your partner's car and wait for him/her to listen to it as a surprise. You can also put the CD in a card on a special occasion.
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    Give your loved one a massage. If you know your partner had a long day at work, invite him or her over to you for a long, relaxing back or foot massage. You can even add some lotion or oils to make it extra romantic and sexy.
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    Make a photo album. It's likely that most of your photos are online. Print out the special ones and make a small photo album for your loved one to give him or her a physical reminder about how much you mean to each other. You can even write funny captions for the photos in the album to make the gift more silly and meaningful
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    Celebrate Valentine's Day on a random day. Who says you need to wait for a Hallmark holiday to tell your loved one how you feel? Pick a random night to celebrate Valentine's Day -- complete with a card, a nice dinner, and a long, loving night. This will be a very romantic move that will surprise and delight your partner.
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    Declare your love in an old-fashioned way. Dedicate a song to your loved one on the radio and make sure he or she is listening at the right time. You can also declare your love by writing a poem to your loved one and wrapping it around a bottle of wine. You can even serenade your loved one in a public place -- as long as this doesn't embarrass him or her. There are dozens of ways to come up with romantic ideas that are old-fashioned but not corny.
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    Be a little kid. You can be romantic by showing your loved one how much you care in a silly way. Take him/her to a county fair, hold his/her hand, and win him/her a silly stuffed animal. Go mini-golfing and write "I love you" at the bottom of the score sheet. Go to an amusement or water park together and have fun acting like lovesick teenagers. Who says youth is wasted on the young? You can show your love to your partner by being romantic like a teenager at any age. Here are some other ways to be romantic while acting like a little kid:
    • Make balloon animals together.
    • Spend an afternoon fingerpainting.
    • See a fireworks display.
    • Make cupcakes.
    • Watch a silly movie from your childhoods.
    • Tell loving knock-knock jokes.

Method 3
Keep Things Fresh

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    Give physical affection to your loved one. If you're more touchy-feely with your loved one, you're more likely to feel romantic -- and in the mood. No matter how long you've been together, you should cuddle, kiss, and show your loved one affection often enough to make that person feel truly loved.
    • You don't have to hold hands all the time, but if you're going for a walk, hold your loved one's hand.
    • If you're watching a movie, put your arm around your loved one, or snuggle up next to him or her.
    • Don't let a day go by without kissing your loved one, even if it's just a peck on the lips.
    • Hug your loved one as often as you can.
    • Think of new ways to give your loved one affection. It can be by tickling him or her in bed, gently stroking his/her hair, or by squeezing his/her side.
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    Give new compliments. To keep things fresh, you should not only give your loved one compliments whenever you can, but you should think of new and exciting compliments to give your loved one to make him or her feel truly special. Though you can go back to the same old compliments -- the beautiful color of your wife's eyes, or your new boyfriend's sexy smile, you can also mix things up by thinking of something new to appreciate about your loved one.
    • Find one new thing to compliment your loved one about each week. It could be a physical trait, or an aspect of his or her personality. Thinking of something new will also make you find even more things to appreciate about your special someone.
    • You can write the compliment in a note that you leave for your loved one to find. That will be even more romantic.
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    Keep looking sharp. If you want to keep the romance alive, you have to keep things fresh by always attending to your looks. If you've been with the same person for years, you can start to get lazy, wear sweatpants all the time, and forget to shower or shave, but that's not the way to go if you want to keep things romantic. Try to pay as much attention to your looks as you did when you first met the person you love.
    • Groom daily. Shower, shave, wash your hair, and do whatever you have to do to keep looking fresh.
    • Continue to dress up for date night. Even if it's your 500th date night, you should keep things fresh by always attending to your looks.
    • Try out a new haircut, style of makeup, or a new set of clothes you never normally would wear. Keep things feeling fun and different.
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    Never stop the courtship. Pretend that you and the person just met, and you want the person to fall for you. What would you do to impress him or her? To show him or her that you're interested? To win your loved one over? Treat your partner like he or she is single, like you're trying to earn his or her affection and trust.
    • The opposite of being romanced is being taken for granted. No one wants to feel like he or she has already been "caught" and it's over and done with. Put on a show! Stay on your toes!
    • The most romantic ideas come to people when they fear they might lose the one they love. But you don't have to actually be on the verge of losing someone in order to tap into that mindset.
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    Be spontaneous. Many people associate the beginning of a relationship with romance, excitement and inspiration because everything is new. You've just met this person and the relationship is unfolding--what will happen tomorrow? Next week? Next month? Will he/she call? Will we kiss? Will he/she visit? But after the relationship is established, we settle into a routine, and nothing is new anymore.
    • To be romantic, to reintroduce the excitement that characterized the beginning of the relationship, do something different, something that your partner wouldn't expect. The more out of the ordinary, the better!
    • Take your partner on a weekend trip out of the blue, stop him or her in the middle of the street for a long, lingering kiss, or mail a letter to your partner listing all of the reasons you love him or her -- even if you live at the same address.
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    Make your bedroom more sexy. If you make your bedroom more sexy, you'll feel more excited about getting frisky with your loved one. Make sure your bedroom is a den for sex and excitement, not a place for you to throw dirty clothes or old food wrappers, or a room that doubles as an office or a playpen for your children.
    • You and your loved one can work together to make your bedroom more simple and more sexy, leaving you no option to do anything other than sleep or make love in the bedroom.
    • Even working together to "sexify" your bedroom can make you feel more romantic and sexy.
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    Be romantic in the bedroom. Whether you've been sleeping with the same person for years or just getting past the kissing stage in your relationship, you should always make things romantic in the kissing or love-making department. Never forget to look into your loved one's eyes, to tell him or her how much he or she means to you, and to deliver fresh compliments when you're kissing or just snuggling.
    • Don't just cut to the chase -- take the time to make the other person feel loved or appreciated.
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    Spend some time apart. Though it may not feel very romantic to spend time apart from the person you love, spending some time apart, even if it's just a weekend away or a longer period of time, will help you remember why you love each other and will make you miss and appreciate each other even more.
    • Making time to hang out with your friends separately will help you appreciate your date nights together even more.
    • While you're apart, you can even both make a list of all of the things you miss about each other. That will be very romantic.
    • If you're apart for a few weeks or even longer, then you can write each other letters -- along with or instead of calling and emailing -- that say how much you mean to each other.
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    Explore the outdoors. Exploring the outdoors can make any couple feel romantic, whether you're nature lovers or not. Even taking a walk together every morning can make you feel more romantic, and so can going on a short hike, walking along the beach, or spending an afternoon picnicking or hanging out in a park.
    • Make sure to spend at least one day a week doing something outdoorsy together.
    • Even enjoying a home-cooked meal on your balcony or on your back porch can make you feel more romantic.
    • Watching a sunset together is always romantic no matter where you are.

Method 4
Keep Growing Together

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    Do activities that raise your adrenalin. Make time to do some activities that raise you and your loved one's adrenalin, whether it's taking a brisk walk, doing yoga, or going to the gym together. When your adrenalin is pumping, you will feel more sexy, and more romantic, about being with your loved one. If you and your loved one don't regularly exercise together, try to do something that raises your adrenalin together at least once a week.
    • Even walking to dinner instead of driving will raise your adrenalin.
    • Take a dance class together. Not only is that romantic, but it will get your blood pumping.
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    Build up your self-esteem. If you and your loved one have high self-esteem, you will not only feel better about yourselves, but you'll feel better about each other and your relationship, and will therefore feel more romantic. Some ways to improve your self-esteem are to excise regularly, eat a healthier diet, and to build your confidence by taking the pride in the things you do and the things that make you special.
    • You and your loved one can also build one another's confidence by praising and complimenting each other.
    • Take pride in making and reaching your long and short-term goals. This will help you build self-esteem as well.
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    Pursue new romantic interests together. If you want your relationship to grow and to continue to be romantic, then you and your loved one should pursue new interests that are romantic together. This will keep your relationship feeling fresh and will give you new things to look forward to together. Here are some romantic interests that you can pursue together:
    • Take a salsa, ballroom dancing, or a tap-dancing class together.
    • If you're musically inclined, write a duet together and practice performing it.
    • Take a ceramics or painting class together.
    • If you both love to write, write romantic sonnets to each other.
    • Make stargazing a hobby. Have fun exploring the stars together -- along with your loved one's dreamy eyes.
    • Learn to cook together. Have fun cooking a tasty and sexy Italian meal together, and enjoy sipping wine and listening to jazz as you do it.
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    Always tell each other how you feel. If you really want to grow as a couple, then you should always tell each other how much you love each other, and how special the relationship is to you. No matter how stressed out, annoyed, or cranky you may feel, you shouldn't let a day go by without acknowledging how much the other person means to you.

Romance Help

Sample Gift Ideas

Sample Date Ideas

Sample Couples Vouchers


  • Don't be too clingy or you might turn off your partner.
  • Don't assume that the person you're romancing is just like you. A night of ballroom dancing might be the most romantic thing in the world to you, but your partner might feel otherwise. Remember that no matter how close the person is to you, he or she is an individual, not an extension of yourself. Surprise your partner by doing something you'd never normally do on your own, just because you know it'd make him/her happy.
  • If your partner doesn't seem to appreciate your efforts, it's not that you've failed to be romantic; it's that your partner has failed to receive your affection. Maybe he's/she's not accustomed to being romanced, or maybe he's/she's distracted by other stresses in his/her life. If you feel rejected, don't just give up. Talk to the person about it.
  • Sometimes being 'old school' or chivalrous (for both genders) could work wonders.
  • If you're still a loss for ideas (or have some to share), check out How to Come Up with Romantic Ideas.


  • Being romantic doesn't mean being obsessive. There's a difference between expressing appreciation and expecting a person to devote all of their time to you in return. You're an individual, not just one half of a relationship, so don't be consumed by your efforts to romance someone else. You can be romantic and be yourself at the same time.
  • Don't allow outward romance to drown out inward warnings. If a guy or a girl seems too good to be true, go slowly and find out what he or she is really all about. He or she may be all right, but only time will tell.

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Categories: Love and Romance