How to Be a Relationship Guru

Think you know all there is to know about relationships? You might just be the right person for taking on a self-appointed role as a relationship guru! It will require working out what sort of adviser you wish to be and knowing where your strengths lie in helping others. Moreover, you'll need to prove to people that your style of advising is worthy of the title of relationship guru––it must be earned and only time and successful outcomes will tell.


  1. 1
    Decide what sort of guru you'd like to be. You could an official relationship guru, holding a degree in psychology, theology, medicine, communications, social work, sociology, or some other related discipline. Or, you could be a guru based on a lot of experience in the field, helping others to get along in their everyday lives, at work, at home, on the sports field, or anywhere in between. Whichever way you choose, you will need to be credible, reliable and trusted. It might help to have expert qualifications but sometimes that can scare people away, so it comes down to who you are and how good you are with people.
  2. 2
    Decide whether you want to be a relationship guru as a career or vocation or just as something fun to do now and then. If you're just wanting to dabble in it, then that's fine but if you want to make a bit of income out of being a relationship guru, then you will need to have good qualifications and/or experience for this role. Some of the possibilities among many include:
    • Invent the role from scratch. Make of it what you can, given the person you are.
    • Be a relationship psychologist/sociologist/doctor. Use your degree as the stamp of credibility and ability to help others.
    • Be a spiritual adviser focused on relationships. Perhaps you've had years of experience advising people spiritually, including in relationships.
    • Be a teacher, facilitator and guide. Use your teaching skills to help guide people to help themselves within a relationship.
  3. 3
    Be learned. Read all that you can about relationships and relationship advice. Read quality materials in the areas of psychology, sociology, neuropsychology, medicine, self-help and more. Wherever you can find materials that are relevant, be reading and learning from them. Take good notes for future reference.
    • Learn the basics of conflict resolution and consider getting advanced qualifications in this skill. Nobody should be advising others on relationships without having at least some skill in this area. Conflicts are bound to be at the heart of almost every relational issue. Know how to spot them and help people find ways to deal with them constructively.
    • Consider developing a good reference library, either in real books or ebooks, so that you have good sources to refer to when you are offering advice, solace and help to people.
  4. 4
    Write articles of your own. Develop a website or a blog in which you offer advice. This is the perfect place for you to demonstrate your particular brand of wisdom and advice, allowing people to read your work and decide for themselves if you're the relationship guru for their needs.
    • Be sure to answer comments, so that people know you're interactive and ready to help.
  5. 5
    Decide where you'll operate from. You may need premises, depending on how you're conducting your business or service as a relationship guru. If so, you could have a home office, a rented space, a hot desk in an incubator for new entrepreneurs, or a boat floating off the waters of Bali. It's up to you to decide where to locate and where you're likely to get the customers or interested persons coming to see you.
    • Consider offering a hotline contact or an answer-by-email service, or something similar, so that people can reach out to you for advice by phone or online. Some people may feel this is the most comfortable way to connect with you.
  6. 6
    Define what a relationship guru is according to your own terms. At the end of the day, this is really about carving out a career or vocational niche for yourself. Anyone who truly aspires to being a "guru" also shouldn't go around calling themselves such, for the term guru is one that is earned, not self-anointed.


  • Believe in yourself first of all. If you want to be a relationship guru, work to make it happen. Find the means by which it will happen for you and go after achieving those means. If that requires you going back to school, it may well be worth it.
  • Will you charge for your services as a relationship guru or simply offer your advice for free? Offering for free might be more in alignment with guru status, and you can still sell books, monetize your blog and perhaps sell related items, if needed. (Or keep your day job.)
  • Make sure you are doing this for the right reasons - because you want to help people. If you don't enjoy it and look at it just as a way of making money, your clients will sense this and you will lose their trust. Like with most artistic careers, you have to have a passion for it, or else you won't go very far. Stay true to yourself and know/love your audience.


  • In some jurisdictions, offering advice of certain types must be done pursuant to the proper qualifications. Know your local laws.
  • Do not pretend to know answers to people's relationship problems. The best a relationship guru can do is to open people's minds to the possibilities and to work from there, to work out the answers for themselves. You are just a conduit, not an all-knowing eye or fixer.

Things You'll Need

  • Appropriate qualifications and/or experience
  • Books on relationships; more on conflict resolution
  • Courses, as needed
  • Somewhere to practice your relationship guidance from
  • Business cards to promote your business
  • Website or blog to share your advice to all

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