How to Avoid Being Played

No one wants to be played by a player -- it can only end in humiliation and heartbreak! Luckily, players are pretty easy to avoid once you know which telltale signs to look out for. Then you can just focus your attention on the good guys!


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    Players pretend to catch feelings quickly. They will call every night, text all day, and perhaps even fall asleep on the phone with you at night. As flattered as you might be, know that it is all a trap! His goal is for you to get used to it. By doing the above, he is getting that routine stored into your brain, so that the next week when he stops talking to you, you're already head-over-heels for him. If you want to keep a player around you, you need to take your time. When he tries to fall asleep on the phone while still talking to you and events similar to that, do not let it happen. One way to make this work is to avoid allowing the phone conversation to last over an hour.
    • How does it work? It was a routine of yours - you are so used to talking to him all night, but he suddenly isn't talking to you. As a result, you'll begin to miss him. That's when you hit him up, and then he knows he has you wrapped around his finger.
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    Players love to give nicknames. Most of the time, he will give you a nickname to make situations cute and along those lines. However, he is giving you a nickname to make you feel more of a connection to them. Some guys are quick to call you "babe", "honey bunches", or "cutie pie". If you catch that in the player you've got, watch out and be warned: players can be sweet talkers and smooth with their words.
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    Players love to ask you about your sex life. Although guys may be naturally curious about it, the number of guys you've slept with isn't essential to building a good, genuine relationship.
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    Players love to spoil you with compliments. "Babe, you are so beautiful" may be one of them. Even if you felt so ugly that day, there will always be this one guy saying, "Oh, you look beautiful" or "You look great" for no reason. As flattered as you may feel, remember that they are complimenting you to make you feel good about yourself. When a girl feels good about herself, their confidence level goes up, and she'll be willing to do anything to get that confidence even higher. Also, guys are aware that girls love compliments.
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    Players will start to talk about their lives. They might say something similar to "I've been hurt in the past." They are opening up and making you feel that you have a closer connection to them. It is all for sympathy points! They will burst out with emotions and will talk about how they have been played before, how they have been hurt really badly before, and that they know how you feel. Chances are they have been heartbroken before, but that heartbreak is what lead them to become a player. A lot of the times players pull the line, ā€œIā€™m a changed man, I have had my share of playing games. But those days are done; I just want to meet someone that can keep me on track.ā€ Girls start feeling sympathy for them, and they want to be there for them. Naturally, when a girl sees a guy is heartbroken, girls like to comfort them and give them a shoulder to lean on. The more they want to be there for the players, the more girls get to know them. However, the more they get attached, the harder it is for them to pull out.
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    Players love to pull the line, "I would treat you better than that - I would never do you wrong." A lot of the times, girls are vulnerable. When girls see that a guy is understanding, they begin to think that this guy will be the one and that they will not break their hearts. Just because the guy claims that he will treat her better doesn't necessarily mean he will keep that promise in the future.
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    Players will not want to be seen in public or have a public relationship. One example is on Facebook. Players will not want to be seen in public with you - not because they are shy, or they are scared, or their friends will make fun of them - but because he might run into one of his other girls he is talking to when your back is turned. The player will not want to change his relationship status on Facebook or talk about you on Facebook. A lot of the times, they claim they are not ready, or they just do not want to be seen in public with you. The truth is they do not want to make it seem like they have anything to do with you because that shuts down their market of getting other girls. There is a 50 percent chance that he really is not ready for a relationship, but there is a 50 percent chance that he just does not want to be tied down. If any guy really likes you, he would want to have that tie with you so that no one else can claim you.


  • Players will also bring you out to public places, but sometimes he or she will try to avoid it. He or she will only be comfortable with you when you two are alone. When you're out in public areas, he'll or she'll look all over the place. His or her actions have already warned you that he or she is possibly a player. Do not cling onto him or her just because you're desperate for a relationship or you're certain that he'll she'll change in the end. Sooner or later, you'll be convincing yourself that you're merely imagining his or her actions, and you'll hurt yourself in the end.
  • Sex can lead to an emotional attachment to someone you are interested in, even if they are a player only using you. This happens to both men and women. Be smart.
  • Some men and women want to flirt, some men and women do want to do nice things. In the end, a player wants sex, a genuine man or woman won't pressure, or shame a woman or man for sex. True love and not simple lust for a person can be proven by waiting.
  • Players will be very romantic with you in public, especially in the same areas you two keep repeatedly visiting. If you constantly find yourself in the same places and not moving anywhere (ex: always going to the movie theater), know that it's a trap and it's time to move on no matter what.

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Categories: Self Defense